“He or she” is a common English expression, but choosing between he or she, he, she, and singular they can be more complicated than it first appears. The phrase traditionally refers to a person whose gender is unknown or unspecified, allowing writers to avoid choosing one gendered pronoun. You may encounter it in school assignments, workplace policies, instructions, and formal documents. Although “he or she” is grammatically correct, it is not always the clearest or most natural option. Understanding its meaning, grammatical forms, and modern alternatives will help you write sentences that are accurate, respectful, and easy to understand.
The main challenge is knowing which pronoun fits the situation. For example, should you write, “Every student must bring his or her notebook,” or “Every student must bring their notebook”? Both constructions can communicate the intended meaning, but they differ in style and grammatical structure. Singular “they” is widely accepted in contemporary English, including many formal writing contexts, and often makes sentences shorter and more inclusive. However, a person’s stated pronouns, the intended meaning, and an organization’s style guide can all affect the appropriate choice. Learning these distinctions makes everyday communication much easier.
In this guide, you will learn what “he or she” means, whether it is grammatically correct, how to use its subject and object forms, and how its possessive and reflexive forms work. You will also see practical examples, compare gendered pronouns with singular “they,” and discover alternatives that make awkward sentences more natural. Rather than treating one expression as universally correct for every situation, this article explains when each option works best and why. By the end, you should be able to choose pronouns confidently in academic writing, professional communication, and ordinary conversation without sacrificing clarity or grammatical accuracy.
What Does “He or She” Mean?
“He or she” is a third-person singular pronoun expression traditionally used when referring to one person whose gender is unknown or unspecified. Instead of choosing only “he” or only “she,” the writer includes both possibilities.
For example:
- If a customer needs assistance, he or she can contact the support team.
- Every applicant should explain why he or she is qualified for the position.
- A student may ask the teacher for help if he or she does not understand the lesson.
In each example, the writer refers to one person without identifying that person’s gender.
He and She: Understanding the Difference
He is traditionally used for a person who uses he/him pronouns, while she is traditionally used for a person who uses she/her pronouns. Both are subject pronouns, meaning they can perform the action expressed by a verb.
Consider these examples:
- He works at the local library.
- She works at the local library.
Both sentences are grammatically correct. The difference lies in the pronoun used to refer to the person.
However, these pronouns are not interchangeable for every individual. When writing about a specific person, use the pronouns that person uses rather than guessing from their name, appearance, occupation, or other characteristics.
What Is “He or She” Called?
Grammatically, “he or she” is a coordinated expression containing two pronouns joined by the conjunction or. It is often described as a paired pronoun expression or a gendered alternative for referring to an unspecified person.
Related expressions include:
- He/she: A shortened written alternative, particularly in forms and notes.
- S/he: A compact written form that combines “she” and “he.”
- Him or her: The corresponding object-pronoun expression.
- His or her: A possessive expression used before a noun.
- Singular they: A gender-neutral alternative that can refer to one person.
These expressions do not all work in the same grammatical position. Choosing between them requires attention to the role the pronoun plays in the sentence.
A Note About “He-She”
The expression “he-she” should not automatically be treated as another spelling of “he or she.” Depending on context, it can be used as a noun or label referring to a person, sometimes in a derogatory or disrespectful way.
If your goal is to refer to an unspecified person, use “he or she” or, where appropriate, singular “they.” If you are describing a particular individual, use their stated pronouns and respectful terminology.
Is “He or She” Grammatically Correct?
Yes. “He or she” is grammatically acceptable English. It has traditionally been used in sentences where the writer does not know whether an unspecified person is male or female.
For example:
Every employee should inform his or her supervisor before taking leave.
The sentence follows a traditional construction. However, its grammatical acceptability does not mean it is always the best editorial choice.
Many contemporary writers use singular “they” to avoid lengthy paired expressions and unnecessary assumptions about gender. Major style authorities, including the American Psychological Association and the Modern Language Association, recognize singular “they” in appropriate contexts. The Chicago Manual of Style, 18th edition, published in 2024, also recognizes its use in specific and generic contexts.
Compare the alternatives:
| Construction | Example | Editorial consideration |
| He or she | Each employee should submit his or her report. | Grammatically acceptable but wordy. |
| Singular they | Each employee should submit their report. | Concise and gender-neutral. |
| Sentence rewrite | Employees should submit their reports. | Often smooth, provided the meaning remains accurate. |
The third option is especially useful when revising a document for clarity. It removes the need for a paired expression altogether.
Is “He or She” Outdated?
It is not incorrect or obsolete, but it can sound formal, repetitive, or unnecessarily restrictive in modern writing.
For example, a company handbook that repeatedly says “he or she” may read less naturally than one that uses singular “they” or addresses employees directly as “you.”
The choice depends on context:
- Traditional grammar exercises: “He or she” may be useful for teaching gendered pronoun forms.
- Contemporary articles: Singular “they” often creates a more natural sentence.
- Legal or institutional documents: Follow the applicable drafting conventions and style requirements.
- References to a known individual: Use that person’s pronouns.
The important distinction is that grammar, style, and respectful reference are related but separate considerations.
How to Use “He or She” Correctly in a Sentence
The expression “he or she” is only one form in a larger set of pronouns. When the grammatical role changes, the appropriate form may change as well.
1. Use “He or She” as the Subject
A subject pronoun identifies the person performing an action or being described.
Examples:
- If a student has a question, he or she should raise a hand.
- When an applicant arrives, he or she must check in at reception.
- The winner will receive a certificate if he or she meets the eligibility requirements.
In these examples, the pronoun expression is the subject of the following verb.
Grammar tip: When “he or she” is the subject of a present-tense clause, the verb generally follows singular agreement: “he or she is,” “he or she has,” and “he or she does.”
Correct: Each participant knows that he or she is responsible for registration.
Incorrect: Each participant knows that he or she are responsible for registration.
2. Use “Him or Her” as an Object
When the person receives an action or follows a preposition, the object forms “him” and “her” are used.
Examples:
- Please call him or her after the interview.
- The receptionist will direct the visitor to him or her.
- If you see the new student, introduce yourself to him or her.
Compare the two grammatical positions:
- He or she submitted the form.
- The manager contacted him or her.
The first expression performs the action; the second receives it.
3. Use “His or Her” to Show Possession
“His or her” is generally used before a noun to indicate that something belongs to the person being discussed.
Examples:
- Each applicant must include his or her résumé.
- The student should write his or her name on the first page.
- Every customer can update his or her account online.
There is an important distinction between possessive determiners and possessive pronouns.
- His or her application identifies which application.
- The application is his or hers.
Although “his or her” is often taught as a single expression, the correct form depends on whether a noun follows it.
4. Use “Himself or Herself” as a Reflexive Form
Reflexive pronouns are used when the subject and the person affected by the action refer to the same individual.
Examples:
- The participant introduced himself or herself to the group.
- Each student should prepare himself or herself for the examination.
- The applicant may represent himself or herself during the interview.
This construction is grammatically possible, but it can become cumbersome when repeated throughout a document. A neutral rewrite often improves readability.
For example:
Original: Each student should prepare himself or herself for the examination.
Revised: Each student should prepare for the examination.
The revised version removes the reflexive pronoun without changing the central instruction.
5. Keep Pronouns Consistent
A sentence becomes confusing when its pronouns shift without a clear reason.
Awkward: Each applicant must submit his or her portfolio before they attend the interview.
This sentence may be understood, but the change from “his or her” to “they” is unnecessary unless there is a specific reason for the switch.
Better: Each applicant must submit their portfolio before the interview.
Also correct: Applicants must submit their portfolios before the interviews.
Consistency does not mean forcing every person into the same gendered form. It means selecting a clear construction and maintaining it throughout the relevant passage.
“He or She” vs. “They”: What Is the Difference?
The main difference is that “he or she” explicitly presents two gendered pronoun options, while singular “they” provides a gender-neutral way to refer to one person.
Singular “they” is not a recent invention. It has a long history in English and is now accepted by many major dictionaries and style guides. It can refer to a person whose gender is unknown or irrelevant, as well as someone who uses they/them pronouns.
English Language Institute
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Comparison Table: He or She vs. Singular They
| Feature | He or she | Singular they |
| Reference | One person, traditionally with two gendered possibilities | One person without specifying gender |
| Subject example | He or she is ready. | They are ready. |
| Object example | Contact him or her. | Contact them. |
| Possessive example | His or her bag | Their bag |
| Reflexive example | Himself or herself | Themselves or themself |
| Writing style | Can sound formal or repetitive | Often concise and natural |
| Known personal pronouns | Use only if appropriate to the individual | Use when the person uses they/them pronouns |
| Agreement | Singular verb forms | Normally plural-form verb forms |
The table highlights an important point: singular “they” takes plural-form verbs, even when it refers to one person.
Correct: The customer says they are waiting.
Incorrect: The customer says they is waiting.
The verb follows the grammatical form of “they,” not the number of people being discussed.
Why Many Modern Writers Prefer Singular “They”
Consider a workplace instruction:
If an employee needs assistance, he or she should contact his or her supervisor.
The sentence is understandable, but the paired pronouns slow it down.
A more concise version is:
If an employee needs assistance, they should contact their supervisor.
Another option is to restructure the sentence:
Employees who need assistance should contact their supervisors.
Each version has a slightly different structure, but all can communicate the intended policy.
Singular “they” is particularly useful when:
- The person’s gender is unknown.
- Gender has no bearing on the information.
- You are referring to a hypothetical individual.
- You are writing for a broad audience.
- You know the individual uses they/them pronouns.
The last case is different from merely not knowing someone’s gender. When a person has stated their pronouns, using them is a matter of accurately referring to that individual, not simply choosing a stylistic alternative.
How to Use Singular “They” Correctly
Singular “they” follows a consistent set of forms.
| Grammatical role | Form | Example |
| Subject | They | They work in marketing. |
| Object | Them | I called them yesterday. |
| Possessive determiner | Their | Their office is upstairs. |
| Possessive pronoun | Theirs | The blue folder is theirs. |
| Reflexive | Themselves / themself | They completed the task themselves. |
“Themselves” is widely used with singular “they.” “Themself” is also an established singular reflexive form, and some style guides or individuals may prefer it in particular contexts. When referring to a specific person, respect their stated usage.
One common mistake is to assume that singular “they” must take singular verb forms because it refers to one person. English does not work that way:
- They are available.
- They have completed the task.
- They do excellent work.
The same verb patterns apply when “they” refers to a group.
When Should You Use “He or She,” “They,” or Another Construction?
There is no single pronoun choice that suits every sentence. The best option depends on whom you are referring to, what you want to communicate, and the conventions of your writing.
When “He or She” Is Appropriate
Use “he or she” when the paired construction serves a clear purpose and fits the context.
For example, a traditional grammar exercise might ask:
A person should always keep his or her promises. Identify the subject pronoun and the possessive expression.
Here, the gendered forms are part of the lesson. Replacing them with singular “they” might undermine the specific grammar point being taught.
The expression may also appear in an established document whose terminology must remain consistent. If you are editing a policy, however, check whether the organization permits a more concise alternative before preserving the original wording.
Practical rule: Do not change “he or she” merely because it is traditional, and do not retain it automatically merely because it is grammatically correct. Consider the document’s purpose.
When Singular “They” Is Better
Singular “they” is often the more natural choice when referring to an unspecified person.
Consider a customer-service instruction:
- Wordier: If a customer loses his or her receipt, he or she should contact the store.
- More concise: If a customer loses their receipt, they should contact the store.
The second version is easier to read and does not require the writer to frame the person as either male or female.
Use singular “they” when referring to a specific person who uses they/them pronouns, too. In that situation, the pronoun reflects the person’s own usage rather than an assumption about an unknown person.
When a Sentence Rewrite Is Better Than Either Option
Sometimes, the cleanest solution is to remove the pronoun altogether.
| Original sentence | Improved version | Why it works |
| Every student must bring his or her identification. | All students must bring their identification. | A plural subject makes the sentence flow naturally. |
| If a customer calls, he or she should leave a message. | Callers should leave a message. | The sentence becomes shorter and more direct. |
| Each applicant must explain why he or she is suitable. | Each applicant must explain their suitability. | The rewrite avoids repeating a pronoun expression. |
| A person should protect his or her password. | Protect your password. | Direct address works well for instructions. |
These techniques are useful because they solve more than a pronoun problem. They can also eliminate wordiness and make instructions easier to follow.
Be careful, though: a rewrite should preserve the original meaning. Changing a singular subject into a plural one may affect details elsewhere in the sentence, especially when the number of people matters.
Subject Pronouns, Object Pronouns, and Possessive Forms at a Glance
English pronouns change form depending on their grammatical role. Understanding these differences will help you avoid errors whether you choose “he or she,” singular “they,” or a pronoun for a specific individual.
| Function | He/him set | She/her set | They/them set |
| Subject | He | She | They |
| Object | Him | Her | Them |
| Possessive before a noun | His | Her | Their |
| Possessive standing alone | His | Hers | Theirs |
| Reflexive | Himself | Herself | Themselves / Themself |
The table includes forms that serve different purposes, even when they look similar.
For example, “her” can be an object pronoun or a possessive determiner:
- I spoke to her. (Object)
- I read her report. (Possessive determiner)
Likewise, “his” can appear before a noun or stand alone:
- This is his notebook.
- This notebook is his.
The possessive forms “hers” and “theirs” do not take apostrophes. Writing “her’s” or “their’s” is incorrect.
A Simple Test for Subject vs. Object
When you are unsure whether to use “he or she” or “him or her,” identify the role the expression plays.
Step 1: Find the verb. Determine who performs the action and who receives it.
Step 2: Check the position. A subject pronoun usually appears as the subject of a verb. An object pronoun commonly follows an action verb or a preposition.
Step 3: Test the sentence. Temporarily replace the paired expression with “he” or “him.”
For example:
- “___ completed the assignment.” → He completed the assignment.
- “The teacher praised ___.” → The teacher praised him.
- “The teacher spoke to ___.” → The teacher spoke to him.
If “he” fits, use “he or she” when that paired expression is appropriate. If “him” fits, use “him or her.”
This is a useful beginner’s test, although sentence structure can become more complicated in longer clauses. When in doubt, examine the full clause rather than relying on word order alone.
Common Mistakes With “He or She” and Singular “They”
Knowing the forms is only part of using them well. Writers also need to recognize situations where a technically possible construction creates confusion or unnecessary complexity.
Mistake 1: Using “He or She” in Every Sentence
Repeated paired pronouns can make a document sound mechanical.
Awkward: Each employee should review his or her schedule and inform his or her supervisor if he or she notices an error.
Better: Employees should review their schedules and notify their supervisors of any errors.
The revised sentence is shorter and easier to scan. It also demonstrates why changing sentence structure can be more effective than replacing individual words.
Mistake 2: Using the Wrong Pronoun Form
Incorrect: The interviewer spoke to he or she after the meeting.
Correct: The interviewer spoke to him or her after the meeting.
The pronoun follows the preposition “to,” so the object form is required.
Similarly:
- Incorrect: The employee submitted he or she report.
- Correct: The employee submitted his or her report.
Before choosing a form, identify its grammatical function.
Mistake 3: Writing “They Is” for One Person
Incorrect: Every applicant must confirm that they is eligible.
Correct: Every applicant must confirm that they are eligible.
Singular “they” uses the same present-tense forms as plural “they.” The fact that the sentence refers to one applicant does not change that agreement.
Mistake 4: Assuming “They” Always Means More Than One Person
“They” can refer to a group, but it can also refer to a single person.
For example:
Someone left their umbrella in the reception area.
The sentence does not establish how many people left umbrellas. “Someone” refers to one unidentified person, and “their” naturally refers back to that person.
Context tells the reader whether “they” is singular or plural.
Mistake 5: Switching Pronouns Without a Clear Referent
Consider this sentence:
Jordan submitted his report, and they later presented it to the team.
If Jordan uses he/him pronouns, the shift to “they” may confuse readers unless the change is intentional and explained by context.
Use the person’s stated pronouns consistently. If two people are involved, repeat a name or role when necessary to make the reference clear.
Mistake 6: Treating Every Style Guide as Identical
A grammar textbook, academic journal, government agency, and company may follow different editorial conventions. Some older materials discourage singular “they” in particular constructions, while many contemporary authorities accept it.
For example, APA Style endorses singular “they,” and the MLA advises writers to respect an individual’s pronouns.
Expert recommendation: If you are writing for a publication, school, employer, or official institution, check its current style guide. Do not assume that a preference in one organization applies everywhere.
How “He or She” Works in Different Types of Writing
The appropriate pronoun choice often becomes clearer when you consider the purpose of the document.
Academic Writing
In essays and research papers, the main priorities are precision, consistency, and adherence to the required style guide.
For instance:
If a participant chooses to withdraw, they may do so at any time.
This sentence is concise and gender-neutral. It also avoids assuming the participant’s gender.
If your assignment specifically requires the traditional pronoun forms, follow that instruction. Otherwise, consult the relevant style requirements rather than relying on an outdated blanket rule that singular “they” is always incorrect.
Business Writing and Workplace Communication
Workplace documents often address people whose gender is unknown to the writer: applicants, customers, employees, contractors, or visitors.
Compare:
An applicant must provide his or her contact details.
With:
Applicants must provide their contact details.
The second sentence is straightforward and avoids unnecessary gender distinctions.
For policies, onboarding instructions, and customer-support pages, direct address can be even more effective:
Please provide your contact details before submitting the form.
The choice depends on whether you are describing a rule or speaking directly to the reader.
Legal and Official Documents
Legal writing requires particular care because a small wording change can affect the interpretation of a clause.
An established contract may define a term, reproduce statutory language, or follow jurisdiction-specific drafting conventions. In such cases, do not replace pronouns or rewrite a clause casually.
Where you have discretion, use clear and consistent language, and follow the relevant drafting rules. Grammatical correctness alone does not determine whether a revision is legally appropriate.
Everyday Conversation
In ordinary speech, “he or she” can sound formal, particularly when referring to an unknown person.
For example:
- Formal: If a passenger has a question, he or she should ask the attendant.
- Natural: If a passenger has a question, they should ask the attendant.
- Direct: If you have a question, ask the attendant.
The direct version is often the simplest when the speaker is addressing the listener.
In conversation, clarity matters more than forcing a particular pronoun construction into every sentence.
Practice: Choose the Correct Pronoun
Test your understanding with these eight questions. Choose the form that best fits each sentence, then check the explanations below.
1. Every student should bring ___ notebook to class. (his or her / him or her)
2. The manager spoke to ___ after the interview. (he or she / him or her)
3. If a customer needs help, ___ can contact support. (they are / they is)
4. The blue folder is ___. (their / theirs)
5. The participant introduced ___ to the group. (himself or herself / him or her)
6. Someone left ___ phone on the desk. (their / them)
7. Rewrite this sentence to make it more concise: “Each employee should inform his or her supervisor.”
8. If you know that a person uses they/them pronouns, which pronoun should you use when referring to that person?
Answers and Explanations
1. His or her. The expression comes before the noun “notebook” and indicates possession. “Their” would also be appropriate in a contemporary gender-neutral rewrite.
2. Him or her. The pronoun follows the preposition “to,” so the object form is required.
3. They are. Singular “they” takes the verb form “are,” not “is.”
4. Theirs. A possessive pronoun stands alone without a following noun.
5. Himself or herself. The reflexive form refers back to the participant who performed the action. Depending on the context, a sentence rewrite may be more natural.
6. Their. “Their” is the possessive determiner before “phone.” It can refer to the unidentified person represented by “someone.”
7. Possible answer: “Employees should inform their supervisors.” The plural rewrite removes the paired pronoun and makes the instruction concise.
8. They/them. Use the person’s stated pronouns consistently, including the corresponding possessive forms where needed.
Conclusion
“He or she” remains a grammatically correct expression, but good writing requires more than following a traditional rule. You need to consider clarity, context, grammatical function, and the person being discussed. Use “he or she” when the paired expression serves a genuine purpose, “him or her” when an object form is required, and “his or her” when indicating possession. When gender is unknown or irrelevant, singular “they” or a carefully rewritten sentence will often sound more natural. For specific individuals, respect their stated pronouns, and follow any applicable editorial requirements. One final actionable tip: Before publishing, review your article for repeated gendered expressions and replace unnecessary ones with clearer alternatives. A common mistake to avoid is assuming that grammatical correctness automatically makes a phrase the best stylistic choice. The strongest writing is precise, respectful, and easy to understand.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q1. Should I write “he or she” or “she or he”?
Both expressions are grammatically acceptable. The order does not change the basic meaning, and neither is universally required. Choose the version that sounds natural in context, remain consistent throughout your document, and consider whether singular “they” would communicate the same idea more clearly.
Q2. Can I use “they” in a formal email or academic essay?
Yes. Singular “they” is accepted in many formal and academic contexts. The American Psychological Association endorses it, and the MLA recognizes its use. However, always check your institution’s current requirements, particularly when submitting work to a journal, university, or organization with a specific editorial style.
Q3. What is the difference between “he/she” and “he or she”?
Both expressions traditionally communicate the same basic idea. “He or she” spells out the alternatives, while “he/she” combines them using a slash. The slash form is compact but can look less polished in continuous prose. Singular “they” or a sentence rewrite may improve readability.
Q4. Is it wrong to use “he” when a person’s gender is unknown?
Using “he” generically has a history in English, but many contemporary writers avoid it because readers may interpret it as referring exclusively to men. Singular “they” is generally a more inclusive alternative. For a specific individual, use their stated pronouns whenever you know them.
Q5. Can I use “he or she” when referring to a nonbinary person?
Do not assume that “he or she” accurately describes a particular nonbinary person. Ask which pronouns they use when appropriate, and respect their answer. If the person uses they/them pronouns, use those forms consistently. For an unspecified individual, singular “they” is often a suitable neutral choice.
